WHEN Martin Rooke, a Thurrock resident and Essex Freemason, lost his wife Becky, everything that mattered narrowed to one small person: his daughter Rachael, just two years old.
As a grieving husband and father, Martin faced the immediate responsibility of caring for a very young child while coming to terms with his own loss. Becky, a nurse, had lived with mitochondrial disease and the daily reality of severe seizures, and her passing brought profound change to their family life.
Trying to explain such a loss in a way Rachael could understand was not easy. Martin chose a simple story about a caterpillar becoming a butterfly, not as a metaphor for others, but as a way of helping his daughter feel safe and reassured during a time of confusion and absence.
When Martin shared this within his local Lodge, Henry de Grey, which meets at the Cross Keys Masonic Centre, the response was immediate and sincere. Rather than offering words alone, members focused on being present and offering practical help. That steady and respectful presence reassured Martin that he and his family were not facing this loss in isolation.
Through conversations with David Barton, founder of Get Started Art, a local charity that uses creative activity to support wellbeing for people of all ages—particularly during difficult times—it became clear that Martin’s approach could help other families in similar circumstances. From those discussions came the idea of developing the story into a children’s colouring book, designed to be calm, accessible, and non-intrusive, giving parents and carers a practical way to help young children navigate bereavement.
Essex Freemasons heard about the story and responded with generosity and purpose. This sat naturally alongside their ongoing commitment to local hospice care and family support across the county, including their involvement in a £10,000 Christmas donation to local hospices and the time given by members who volunteered to collect Christmas trees to raise additional funds. They also provided the funding required to produce the book at scale, ensuring it could be shared wherever it might genuinely help.
As a direct result of this work, 5,000 copies are now being distributed across Essex to hospices, hospitals, funeral directors, and family support services, including St Luke’s Hospices and Havens Hospices.
“Stories like Martin’s remind us of the profound impact that compassion and fellowship can have,” said Essex Freemason Colin Felton.
